I can really relate to this Meg. As a mother now entering the teenage years all I’ve ever heard about them is that they are hard/terrible etc. But I also know I am more surefooted now than I was 13 years ago. There are still so many things we don’t talk about - this plus perimenopause/menopause/the rage/the complexity. Thanks for voicing these words!
My pleasure Lucinda. I'm glad it resonates with you. We grow so much as parents. Someone said to me recently that the best words they heard when they were at the beginning of the parenting journey was "It just gets better". Such bloody great powerful words that I wish I had heard rather than the trope of "wait till they're teens...". It is such a pleasure watching my young men grow into themselves and it does just get better.
I completely agree. I try to boost people up when they are having babies or entering new phases, to counteract the many “just you wait until... XXX” that I have heard so many times along the way. It just gets better is a great one to add to the parenting vocab - and true!
Hi Meg, perhaps you've presented the two concentric circles - a person not wanting to be reduced to 'just' a parent. And the parent asking for space while they raise their child.
I just found this and thought it summed up what I was trying to say, which is my impression of what you are trying to say - "In 'life', I don't want to be reduced to my work. In 'work', I don't want to be reduced to my life." Susan Sontag, As Consciousness is Harnessed to Flesh: Journals and Notebooks 1964 - 1980 (2012) which is quoted in the front material of Bernadette Brennan's Leaping Into Waterfalls, a biography of Gillians Mears.
Love this Meg -- esp your comments on hesitation about going to see motherhood-centric discussions... I feel weird about them sometimes, unsure whether they fully resonate for me... Not sure why exactly
I can really relate to this Meg. As a mother now entering the teenage years all I’ve ever heard about them is that they are hard/terrible etc. But I also know I am more surefooted now than I was 13 years ago. There are still so many things we don’t talk about - this plus perimenopause/menopause/the rage/the complexity. Thanks for voicing these words!
My pleasure Lucinda. I'm glad it resonates with you. We grow so much as parents. Someone said to me recently that the best words they heard when they were at the beginning of the parenting journey was "It just gets better". Such bloody great powerful words that I wish I had heard rather than the trope of "wait till they're teens...". It is such a pleasure watching my young men grow into themselves and it does just get better.
x M
I completely agree. I try to boost people up when they are having babies or entering new phases, to counteract the many “just you wait until... XXX” that I have heard so many times along the way. It just gets better is a great one to add to the parenting vocab - and true!
Yes! We need to hold people up rather than through anxiety in their way xx
Hi Meg, perhaps you've presented the two concentric circles - a person not wanting to be reduced to 'just' a parent. And the parent asking for space while they raise their child.
I just found this and thought it summed up what I was trying to say, which is my impression of what you are trying to say - "In 'life', I don't want to be reduced to my work. In 'work', I don't want to be reduced to my life." Susan Sontag, As Consciousness is Harnessed to Flesh: Journals and Notebooks 1964 - 1980 (2012) which is quoted in the front material of Bernadette Brennan's Leaping Into Waterfalls, a biography of Gillians Mears.
A great quote. Bernadette’s book is on my TBR list.
Love this Meg -- esp your comments on hesitation about going to see motherhood-centric discussions... I feel weird about them sometimes, unsure whether they fully resonate for me... Not sure why exactly
Yes! I’m the same. And now my kids are older I second guess it more.